THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON

(Courtesy of http://www.fasttrack.hk)

September 8 will soon be upon us and after two months of turgid boredom, the new horse racing season begins.

What will it bring? Who knows.

But below are The Eleven Commandments one must try to adhere to in order to keep the new season on the straight and narrow.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 1
(Source: Hey Sko)

Thou Shalt not undress like this when attending a Happy Wednesday Night at Happy Valley Racecourse. It can spook the horses and all the udder people.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 2

Thou Shalt patiently join the queue and refrain from making snorting and roaring sounds now that Jo Jo McKinnon has got back to where she belongs- the Singles market.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 3

Thou Shalt donate monies so Racing To Whine’s Three Amigos have a new wardrobe from Hugo Boss and a set not borrowed from Toys R Us.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 4
(Source: Aas Myth)

Thou Shalt not Asketh Matthew Chadwick if he took a bus to the track and nickname him “Bus Uncle”.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 5
(Source: Sing Pao)

Thou Shalt not Asketh Alvin “The Chipmunk” Ng where he squirrels his nuts.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 6
(Source: Wiki)

Thou Shalt refrain from giving the finger to jockeys who fail on horses you have backed. Only Zac Purton has the patent to launch a Zac Attack.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 7
(Source: The Thorough Bred)

Thou Shalt not stare at dandy owner Natalis Chan’s multi-colored hair and ask, “Which fucking Muppet are you?”

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 8
(Source: Sina)

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 9
(Source: Claire Amus)

Thou Shalt not wonder how Colm Donaghue was granted a license to ride in Hong Kong this season or taketh bets as to when he’ll ride his first winner.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 10
(Source: Daily Mail)

Though Shalt not follow Douglas Whyte on any Sean Woods gallopers in the vain hope of winning. It will never happen.

THE ELEVEN COMMANDMENTS FOR THE NEW RACING SEASON 11
(Source: Ta Kung Pao)

Though Shalt not walk up to Tony Cruz and say, “Putha, man, there’s a cockroach in your ear”.

revised 1
(Source: HKJC)

Thou Shalt pray like hell that International Day doesn’t start with a performance by some wobbly Canto-pop chanteuse, having international visitors being met by weird looking mascots, caps given out as souvenirs, and the day ending with yet another obligatory fireworks display.

shatin
(Source: Dreams Time)

This entry was posted in HAPPY WEDNESDAY, Hong Kong Jockey Club, Hong Kong Racing, Horse Racing, www.fasttrack.hk, zac purton and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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